Sweat admist chaos…

3 05 2010

This is a short post. I have exactly 20 minutes on this particular computer. It’s the computer at the hospital. My brother is here. This Brother. It’s complicated. It’s related to his alcholism. I’m the next of kin. I don’t quite even know what that means at this point.

I’ve been thrown for a loop. 

I’m trying to get keep some normalcy in my life. Hence this post. I need to remember this is him. This is not me. I will do what I can to help him move in the right direction if that is what he wants but I will not put myself in any position but first. With that said, I’ve got some updating to get to.

This weekend was my first ever weekend warrior challenge put on by Brandon over at So Long Fat Ass. To revist, my goals were as followed: 1)Drink a gallon of water both Saturday and Sunday 2) Do 70 bosu ball sit-ups 3) Swim 90 laps.

The results : All three goals were achieved!!!! The physical portion of my wwc was completed in one swoop at the gym with a 60 minute elliptical session for poops and giggles. It was just after I got done that I got word my brother was airlifted to the hospital.

Sweat admist chaos.

I came home from the hospital last night and vowed to keep my appointment with Superman today. I was so angst when I woke up that I got there early to run a mile on the treadmill. I pushed as hard as I could to get my head clear. When it was clear, it was time for my appointment and he must have seen something in my eyes because he pushed me almost to the brink of throwing up.

It’s exactly what I needed.

I boxed, I ran, I moved a 20 pound tractor tire outside. I pushed, I pulled, I did a walking plank. I gave Superman the finger and it made his day! In the end I have some awesome rug burns on my arms (from the planks) and he knows I’m not afraid to get dirty while moving a damn tractor tire. On my way out of the gym I stopped and gave him a “DAP” (knocking fists) and he just looked proud.

He said he was sorry about the rug burns. I wear them proudly as battle scars in this war. This war of chaos and trying to move forward even though life gets in the way. This war of becoming a better human being even though genetically it’s stacked against me. This war of “I will not quit” and if you think I will…

I have the battle scars to prove you wrong.

 

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14 responses

3 05 2010
seth @ fitwithapurpose

Way to go on Hitting those goals!!!

3 05 2010
Kassie

In the midst of stress, you chose the right way to go. Amazing work. Good job. I wish I could say I would have chosen the right path, like you did, but I know I would have cancelled that Superman appointment. You are a strong woman and an inspiration.

3 05 2010
jord

Congrats on meeting your goals! My thoughts are with you and your brother. ((hugs))

3 05 2010
Meegan

Stay strong Tara and hang in there with the family stress.

Huge congratulations on meeting all of your goals! And for your hard core workout with superman. I see workouts on TV with people pushing the giant tire – and call me crazy – but I kinda wanna try it…on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being impossible, how tough was it?

I’m like you, I firmly believe the best possible decision in times of stress is to keep working out, its never as important as it is when things get crazy.
I’m sending you good positive vibes all the way from Nova Scotia!

3 05 2010
Brandon

Sorry to hear about all the stress and chaos, but congrats on meeting your goals for the weekend 🙂

3 05 2010
Jeremy Logsdon

Congrats on meeting those goals!

I wish I was there to give you a hug over the stressful family situations. It never seems to fail; those who we often care about, even stupidly care about at times, can be those who hurt us the most. Just stay strong – I don’t know what’s going on, but I do know you are strong enough to handle it, whatever it is. Sounds like you’ve already got your game plan, so you’re going to be okay. 🙂

4 05 2010
Kelli

You really are a warrior. To keep your eyes on the ball during what was I’m sure an incredibly stressful weekend is seriously commendable! 🙂 Your workout sounds like it was taken straight off of biggest loser! Are your sure superman isn’t Jillian’s brother?

Kelli from http://www.sangriasisters.com

4 05 2010
Bella

I’m sorry for what you’re going through with your brother. I won’t even say “stay strong,” because you are one of the strongest people I know.

Great job on meeting (exceeding!) all your goals this weekend.

4 05 2010
seattlerunnergirl

I’m sorry that you’re going through family crap. But I’m proud and UNsurprised that you met your goals this weekend AND are continuing to put yourself first. Keep it up!

5 05 2010
The Merry

I’m sorry to say I can relate.
Good for you for taking out the angst in exercise!

6 05 2010
Josie

You go girl. I wanna push a tractor tire too dammit. LOL

Hope all is well with your brother, but most importantly, YOU.

6 05 2010
263andcounting

Thanks Josie…It made superman proud because I went out the next morning and pushed it even further on my own! As a reward, he made me push the even heavier one. I did it three times. It was much heavier!

7 05 2010
Fubariffic / A Special Shout Out to BBP / Pre OWiS Week in Review « 263 and counting

[…] I saw Superman and earned me some battle scars. I also spent the day at the […]

20 02 2011
Dear Tara… « Life Changing Journey (LCJ)

[…] time during your journey. The 2teens remember the day you got the call that your brother was in the hospital due to his alcoholism. This would mark the first time there was a gain in your journey. You started to realize that […]

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